Dear Internet Explorer:
It’s over. Our relationship just hasn’t been working for a while, and now, this is it. I’m leaving you for another browser.
I know this isn’t a good time–you’re down with yet another virus. I do hope you feel better soon–really, I do–but I, too, have to move on with my life. Fact is, in the entire time I’ve known you, you seem to always have a virus or an occasional worm. You should really see a doctor.
That said, I just can’t continue with this relationship any longer. I know you say you’ll fix things, that next time it’ll go better–but that’s what you said the last time–and the time before that. Each time I believed you.
Well, not any longer.
You cheater!
The truth is there’s nothing more you can say to make things better. I know about your secret marriage to Windows. You say you two are not seeing each other anymore, but I just don’t believe it. You say you can live without Windows, and I’ve heard that Windows can live without you, but I know that’s simply not true.
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